Weight Gain

I have gained a significant amount of weight in the past six months or so. The guilt I've been carrying about this weight has been almost as damaging as my disorder itself. Well at my last appointment with my doctor, I found out that one of my medications has an affect of weight gain. So this whole time I've been beating myself up for ballooning to a size I never thought I'd be, even though I'm going to the gym and eating healthier. I am mad, relieved, confused, upset. It doesn't make me feel better to know that this weight isn't my fault. It makes me scared because I don't know if I'll be able to switch medications or stop it altogether. My next appointment with this doctor isn't until the end of March. So I have until then to worry and grow.

By the way, this is a very sensitive and embarrassing topic for me, but I felt the need to write about it rather than keep it inside.