Skin Effects

I have acne. And I don't mean a few zits here and there. I mean full blown, skin stretched, something-going-on-underneath-acne.

I read all of the information that comes with a new medication. In one a while back, there was listed as a side affect that this medicine could cause "minor skin eruptions." :) Well I guess I'm in that "could" category, because it did. The problem with my medicines (as with all medicines, I guess) is that you have to outweigh the benefit to the possible side effects. So far this medication hasn't helped me, mood-wise, but I'm supposed to "give it time" to take affect. So me and my zits are giving it time. And we hurt. And we're sore. And we're tired of being tender and not being able to hug people the right way.

Work Out

It's so easy to slip out of the gym habit. But I'm going back tomorrow. And even though I don't like it, I'm going to get on those machines and work. I'm doing this for my freaking health.

Weight Gain

I have gained a significant amount of weight in the past six months or so. The guilt I've been carrying about this weight has been almost as damaging as my disorder itself. Well at my last appointment with my doctor, I found out that one of my medications has an affect of weight gain. So this whole time I've been beating myself up for ballooning to a size I never thought I'd be, even though I'm going to the gym and eating healthier. I am mad, relieved, confused, upset. It doesn't make me feel better to know that this weight isn't my fault. It makes me scared because I don't know if I'll be able to switch medications or stop it altogether. My next appointment with this doctor isn't until the end of March. So I have until then to worry and grow.

By the way, this is a very sensitive and embarrassing topic for me, but I felt the need to write about it rather than keep it inside.